* * * * * * * * * * *
"Ok, tell me again why we had to steal this truck. This small, incredibly
trashed truck," Duo asked, eyeing the contraption Wufei had driven up in.
"Hey, it's not my fault that no one will rent a car to us anymore," Wufei
snapped. "Talk to Mr. One-Man-Demolition-Team over there. Hertz, Budget, even
Rent-a-Wreck, it's all the same. Right in their computer, it says, no spandex
boy or any of his associates. So we are reduced to thievery." Wufei glared at
Heero, who was currently looking underneath the old truck, to see if there
were any bombs, apparently.
"Get over it, Wufei. Who knew a minivan even had a self-destruct button
anyway?" Heero replied without looking at him. Duo stifled a giggle, knowing
it would get him hurt by either Wufei or Heero.
"Let's get this piece of crap loaded," Heero said. "We need to get out of
Twenty minutes later, the back of the truck was bulging with various
technical looking equipment. Wufei, Trowa, Quatre and Heero stood outside the
cab, ready to go. They were dressed in their usual outfits. They were waiting
for Duo as usual. Heero was grumbling about Duo's hair always being a problem
when the braided boy sauntered up. He was wearing a tight midriff top that
left his stomach half bare and a tiny pair of cut-off shorts that barely
covered his ass. Duo smiled as Heero's chin threatened to hit the floor.
"What the hell are you wearing?" managed Heero.
"Well, I always get too hot on these little excursions, so I decided to dress
more... appropriately," smirked Duo.
"Wherever did you get that outfit?" squeaked Quatre, trying to keep Trowa
from drooling all over himself.
"Oh, this old thing? Just a little outfit I used to wear in the old days on
L2. It was very hot there, you know. Environmental controls never worked
right. You like it?" Duo turned around, bent over slightly and looked back
over his shoulder at the pilots.
Wufei bolted, mumbling something about Kleenex, Quatre blushed, Trowa licked
his lips and Heero said, "Hn."
Wufei came back, clutching a box of tissues and studiously not looking at
Duo. "I'm driving." No one argued with him.
"Isn't there some other way to all fit in this cab?" Heero wondered. "I
always get crushed."
"Wufei always insists on driving, Duo and I are smallest, and no one else is
damn well sitting on Trowa's lap," Quatre said firmly, clutching the
green-eyed pilot's arm possessively. "That leaves Duo on your lap, I'm
afraid, Heero. Besides, Duo paid me - mmf," Quatre finished as Duo covered
his mouth quickly, grinning.
Heero glowered but didn't say anything, wondering how in the hell he was
going to survive this trip. It was bad enough to have the braided pilot on
his lap normally, squirming around as he did, but dressed like that? It was
going to be hard - in more than one way.
The pilots started arranging themselves in the truck. Wufei slid behind the
wheel, clutching his box of tissues protectively. Trowa got in next, in the
middle, legs straddling the gearshift. Quatre clambered in, happily settling
himself on Trowa's lap and snuggling the green-eyed boy. Heero tried to get
in but was blocked by Duo, bending over so far that his shorts were pulled up
to... "Get out of the way, Duo!" Heero growled.
"Just a minute, Heero. I'm stowing my pack. Gotta have my munchies, ya know,"
Duo grinned at Heero over his shoulder. "K'. All done!" Duo moved back out of
Heero's way, raising his arms up over his head, ostensibly to afford Heero
more room, but mostly just so his shirt would ride up even more. Heero
climbed in the truck. Duo managed to get in the way so Heero brushed against
him. Duo smiled delightedly. This was gonna be fun...
"All ready, Heero?" Duo said suggestively. "Cause here I come!" Duo said with
emphasis on the last word. With that, Duo climbed up onto Heero's lap, going
for the most contact with the cobalt-eyed boy as possible.
Duo settled happily on Heero's spandex-clad lap. Heero clenched his jaw as
Duo very deliberately wriggled around to get a comfortable position. Duo
couldn't decide if he wanted to be able to look at the object of his lust as
he tormented him, or go for the most groin-to-ass contact by facing away. Duo
decided on looking at Heero. This also allowed for possible clutching of
Heero if they encountered turbulence, and since Wufei was driving, that was
practically a given. Wufei seemed to think it dishonorable to drive below the
posted speed limit for any reason whatsoever, like snow, rain, turns,
Heero glared at Duo. How did the longhaired boy know just how to get to him?
It had taken all his iron control not to jump on Duo when he first saw him in
that outfit, and now here he was on his lap, those shorts covering nothing at
all. Heero began to lose the battle with his body and started getting hard.
At any moment, Duo would be able to tell... sometimes spandex had its
Quatre was happily nuzzling Trowa's neck and whispering something to him that
made the green-eyed pilot look as happy as he ever did. Trowa slid his hand
into Quatre's shirt, making the smaller pilot gasp. Quatre's hands dropped to
Trowa's lap and the brown-haired pilot sighed and let his head fall back
against the seat.
"Get a room," growled Heero at the happy couple.
"Speak for yourself," Trowa shot back, eyeing Heero's crotch.
Heero scowled at Trowa. Heero began the difficult task of trying to keep Duo
from sliding back on his slippery spandex-clad lap enough to feel his
hardness, as Wufei sped around corners with no regard for his passengers.
After about 30 minutes of this treatment, Heero noticed that he had seen this
particular bit of scenery before. Peering across the cab at the driver, he
observed, "You're lost."
Wufei began to protest, "The mission briefing was wrong. The turn we were to
take doesn't exist."
"Hn," Heero replied. They were approaching a convenience store. "Stop there
and ask for directions."
"No! I can find it! I will not stop! Asking for directions is dishonorable!"
Heero decided he couldn't take this much longer. He leaned across the
oblivious Quatre and Trowa, and pointed his gun at Wufei's head. "Stop."
"Wow, Heero, where do you hide that gun?" Duo teased. "Oh, that must have
been that bulge I felt!"
"But..." Wufei thought about protesting further, then saw the murderous look
on Heero's face and thought better of it. He pulled into the AM/PM without
While Wufei went in to ask for directions, the other pilots took the
opportunity to stretch their legs. Heero was checking on the equipment in the
back when he heard the whistles.
"Hey baby! Over here!"
"Whoo hoo! Shake it honey!"
"Hey! That ain't no girl!"
"Yeah, Joe, you was yelling at a pretty boy!"
"Shut up! That can't be a boy! Look at that hair!"
"Duo..." Heero muttered under his breath. When he saw the two of the men head
for the store entrance, Heero decided he had better go after Duo.
Duo, meanwhile, had decided he was thirsty. He saw Wufei at the counter,
gesturing wildly at the frightened attendant. Duo grinned as he surveyed his
choices. Sugar, caffeine, artificial flavoring...all of the above, Duo
decided. Grabbing the largest cup available, the Humungous Gulp, he started
putting ice in it. Suddenly, he felt... hands on his braid!
Duo was jerked back as his hair was roughly grabbed. He tried to spin around
but couldn't, as his head was immobilized.
"Asshole! Let go of my hair!" Duo yelled.
"Now that ain't no way for such a pretty girl to talk," a voice drawled in
his ear. The smell of chewing tobacco assaulted Duo as he struggled.
"I told ya, Joe, that ain't no girl!" another voice came from behind him.
Duo tried to kick back at his assailants but he couldn't reach. Then he felt
arms coming around him from behind. The cup of ice fell to the floor. He was
trapped. Where was everyone? Didn't anyone in the store care what was
Strong arms lifted Duo and turned him around. Duo saw one of the guys from
outside standing in front of him, smirking.
"You sure are pretty," drawled the man. "Let's see if you're a boy or a girl."
Duo started to struggle again. He looked around desperately, but there was no
one in the store anymore. Shit.
Rough hands reached for his shirt and pulled it up. "Nope, nothing here,
you're right," the man chuckled. "I still don't believe it though!"
Duo tried to kick out at the man but the man holding him tightened his grip
until Duo thought his arms were going to break. Joe reached for Duo's shorts.
Duo struggled and cried out in pain. Then the glass doors flew open so hard
one of them shattered against the doorstop.
"Heero!" Duo cried. Save me, he thought.
Heero's blood turned to ice as he surveyed the scene before him. His trigger
finger twitched. His fists bunched. Two Neanderthals were in front of him.
One was holding Duo and one had his hand down the front of Duo's pants. HIS
Duo. Though Duo didn't know it yet. MINE! Heero's mind screamed. Heero
advanced one step.
"Who the hell are you?" sneered the man holding Duo. The other man turned
around and looked at Heero.
"Is this a friend of yours? You ain't as pretty as Miss Braid here, but you
ain't bad. I like them tight shorts," he laughed. "You'll have to wait your
turn, though." With that, he turned his back on Heero. His first indication
of trouble came as Duo started to laugh and the man holding him looked
scared. Then all hell broke loose.
Heero threw a roundhouse kick that connected squarely with Joe's head. The
man staggered from the impact. Heero then grabbed the man by the hair and
brought his head down to meet firmly with his knee. As the man slid to the
floor Heero put him in a sleeper hold and the man lapsed into
unconsciousness. Heero dumped him on the floor and turned to face the man
holding his Duo.
All this happened in a matter of seconds and the man was still gaping in
amazement. Heero took another step forward and said in a monotone, "Get.
Your. Hands. Off. Him. NOW."
The man opened and closed his mouth soundlessly. He let go of Duo and started
to back away. Duo slumped and tried to see if his arms still worked, but
wisely remained silent and got the hell out of the way.
Heero watched as the man tried to walk past him and go out the door. As he
went past, Heero's arm shot out and grabbed his collar. Heero then punched
the man in the face so hard he went flying over the counter. There was a
sickening crunch and all was silent.
Heero turned to Duo. They stared at each other for a long moment. Then Duo
launched himself at Heero and hugged him tightly. Duo buried his face in
Heero's neck and breathed deeply. "You saved me! Thanks, Heero!" Duo felt
Heero's arms around him for an all too brief moment.
Heero stepped back then, disentangling himself from the braided boy. "Just
don't do it again. Let's go. We're late."
"But Heeeero! I didn't get my drink!" Duo was still giddy from the hug. Heero
was so strong...
"Get it. And let's go," growled Heero. Little did Duo know that Heero could
never refuse him anything, especially now when adrenaline was still pumping
through him from the fight and then the hug. God, how he wanted Duo. Right
here. Right on the floor. Heero realized he was staring at Duo's ass as the
longhaired boy got his drink. I'm no better than they are, Heero thought
disgustedly. Duo deserves better than me.
Duo got his drink and they hurried back out to the truck where the other
pilots were already waiting for them. They got in the truck and Heero said,
"Get out of here. Fast."
For once, Wufei didn't question him and he burned rubber out of the parking
Trowa and Quatre looked at Heero with wide eyes. Duo clutched his drink and
Heero tightly. Heero's hand clutched Duo's braid protectively. "Don't ask,"
"Did you figure out where we are, Wufei?" Quatre inquired sweetly.
"Yes," Wufei replied shortly, blushing. He had missed a turn while he was
trying not to watch Duo wiggling or Quatre and Trowa kissing. He knew where
he was. Sort of. He checked where his tissues were.
The huge drink that had caused so much trouble was currently causing Heero
even more trouble. The lid had a neck and hole through which you could drink
without a straw, like a sports bottle, sort of. Duo was enthusiastically
sucking on it, wrapping his lips around it and making small happy sounds,
occasionally removing his mouth to lick his lips. He would also
surreptitiously glance at Heero to see if his show was having any effect.
Unfortunately, the object of Duo's lust had his eyes closed at the moment,
his forehead creased in concentration. Duo pouted. All that innocent
seductiveness wasted... Duo wouldn't have worried, if he had known what Heero
was concentrating on at that moment.
I will not get hard I will not get hard I will not get harder oh shit too
late, was going through Heero's mind. Even with his eyes closed he could see
Duo's mouth around the plastic, see his tongue running around the edge...
Heero could see disaster approaching rapidly as Duo began to wriggle around
in his lap again, trying his best to slide backwards.
The old truck chose that particular moment to become airborne over some
railroad tracks. It was unfortunate timing. Duo had just removed the top of
his drink to get at the last sip.
A large portion of the contents described a perfect parabolic arc. Right onto
Heero's chest and stomach. This was not received well.
"DUO!" Heero yelled, showing more emotion than any of them had ever seen, as
the icy liquid soaked him thoroughly. Heero grabbed Duo's braid and yanked.
Duo squeaked as he found himself inches from Heero's face. "You're dead meat."
Heero proceeded to wrap Duo's braid around his neck and throttle him. Duo
started gasping for air and flailing around in the small cab. Needless to
say, this did not improve the situation.
"Hey!" Quatre complained as one of Duo's flailing limbs pushed him into
Wufei. Wufei screamed as Quatre was pushed into his lap, dislodging his
precious Kleenex. Wufei grabbed for the box and connected with something most
decidedly not his tissues.
Quatre gasped, "Wufei! That's my...."
Trowa growled and grabbed Wufei's ponytail. "Hands off."
"I just wanted a penis... I mean Kleenex..." Wufei wailed, head pointed at
Meanwhile, Duo's grasping hands connected with the remains of his ice.
Grabbing a handful, he stuffed it down what he thought was Heero's shirt in
an effort to make him let go of his braid. Unfortunately, this failed because
it was Trowa's shirt, not Heero's, that received the ice.
Releasing Wufei's head, Trowa clawed at his shirt, trying to get the ice out.
Wufei slumped forward, losing hold of the steering wheel. The truck swerved
violently before Wufei was able to regain control. Due to the swerve,
Quatre's face was now in Wufei's lap and Trowa had somehow got his hand down
Duo's pants. Heero noticed this and growled, attempting to choke Trowa. Duo
ended up partly in Trowa's lap with his shirt nearly off. Quatre flailed
around in time to see Duo's hands in Trowa's lap. Huffing with indignation,
Quatre sat up on his elbow, nearly crushing Wufei's manhood in the process,
and tried to slap Duo. Due to the next gyration of the truck, however, he
only managed to get his hands tangled in Trowa's shirt, which subsequently
ripped off. The shirt predictably flew directly onto the driver's face. The
truck swerved again. Now Heero was on Duo's lap and Quatre was on top of
Heero. Trowa was trying to remove his shirt from Wufei's face. Duo began to
yell that he was dying. Heero grabbed Quatre and tried to get him off his own
lap. Unfortunately, Trowa chose that moment to look over and see Heero's
hands on Quatre's ass. Now Trowa growled and reached over to throttle Heero.
Unfortunately, Duo had by now managed to get partially out from underneath
Heero and was in the way. Trying to protect Heero, Duo shoved some ice down
the front of Trowa's pants. Trowa's one visible eye widened before he started
trying to get the ice out. This involved unfastening his pants. Quatre saw
Duo molesting Trowa and went after him. Yanking Duo off Trowa had the effect
of ripping Duo's shirt off. Duo looked in dismay at the ruins of his favorite
shirt, and attacked Quatre with a growl, ripping his pink shirt off. Trowa
grabbed Duo to rescue Quatre, but since Duo only had one item of clothing
left, he had to grab for Duo's shorts. Predictably, there was a loud rip. Duo
now wore only a zebra-striped thong.
"A zebra-striped thong?" they all exclaimed.
"I got it from this cute blue-haired boy. But that's another story," Duo
replied before attacking Trowa. This time Heero got in the way and lost his
ubiquitous tank top. At this point, Wufei was wailing about injustice and
throwing bloodstained Kleenex from the car. Miraculously, all four of the
battling pilots had somehow regained their original positions in the truck.
During a pause in the action, Heero realized there was a nearly naked braided
boy straddling his lap. Trowa and Quatre's eyes met at the same time their
bare chests and unbuttoned pants did. Both sets of pilots promptly forgot the
disagreement as the blood left their brains and headed for more enjoyable
areas. Trowa and Quatre's lips locked and they escaped into their own world.
Heero's eyes met Duo's as Heero realized that Duo was pressed directly
against his hardness. There was no way Heero could deny his feelings now.
There was a hot bulge pressed against Heero's stomach, so he knew Duo felt
the same way. "Heero?" whispered Duo in shock.
"Yes, Duo?" Heero responded as evenly as possible.
"Heero... you... you're...I..." Duo stammered, unable to speak for once.
"Shut up, Duo," Heero replied, and crushed his lips to Duo's at long last.
That was the moment that Wufei chose to look over. His resulting wail of
dismay echoed from the surrounding hills.
The End (for now)