* * * * * * * * * * *

The scene is Dumbledore's office. The old wizard sits behind his desk solemnly as Harry Potter walks in nervously.

"You wanted to see me, Professor?" he stutters, twisting his robes in his hands.

"Yes, Harry, please sit down." Harry perches on the edge of his seat, obviously worried. "Now, something has come to my attention. Something that I must discuss with you."

Harry squirms in his seat. He is not happy to be there and suspects what is going to happen. He is partially right.

"Now, Harry, it has come to my attention," the silver-haired man pauses dramatically, looking over his half-spectacles, "That you and Professor Snape," a disapproving look as Harry starts to sweat, "Have entered into a... relationship. Er, of a sexual nature."

Harry's mouth hangs open. He didn't think they'd been found out, they'd been so careful... "Professor, I..."

Dumbledore holds up his hand to stem the oncoming flow of words. "Let me continue, please, dear boy. Now, I understand that these things do happen in a rarified environment such as Hogwarts. While teacher-student relations are frowned upon, you are after all a seventh-year and nearly an adult. If this is what you desire, I shall not be the one to stand in your way."

Harry is now speechless, his mouth hanging open still. His head spins with questions, but none will come out. Except one. "How?"

"How did I know?" Dumbledore chuckles benignly, demeanor belying the words he speaks. "Very little transpires in Hogwarts that I do not know about, Mr. Potter." He lets that fact sink in for a moment. Harry doesn't know what to say; he wonders just how much the old wizard knows. "Which brings me to the real point of this visit. I must, in all conscience, advise you that Professor Snape is not what he seems."

Harry blushes as memories of his Potions master taking him on his desk in the classroom, on the Quidditch field, tying him to his four-poster bed, run through his fevered mind, and he mentally agrees with that assessment. None would suspect that such a fiery and imaginative libido lives beneath those severe black robes. It had certainly surprised him. But he doesn't say this, just looks wide-eyed at Dumbledore, trying to maintain at least a thin air of innocence. "What do you mean, sir?"

Dumbledore slides his chair back slowly, gets up and walks to a cabinet that Harry hadn't noticed before. The old wizard opens it with a spell to reveal a large Muggle-style monitor. "Over last summer, I decided to try to keep up with the times and install a security monitoring system. With all these dark wizards popping up still, I decided it would be another safety device. It took a while to get a magic-Muggle hybrid system to work here, but I finally managed it. Nearly all the castle is under surveillance now. Purely for the students' safety, of course."

Harry sits back in his chair, dawning shock registering on him, knowing he is screwed. Figuratively and literally. His cheeks begin to burn once again.

Dumbledore notices the boy's discomfiture and adds hastily, "None of the tapes are kept, of course, they are all destroyed in a timely manner. None of this will be held against you, of course." He pauses, taking a deep breath. "Except for the excerpts I am going to show you. Purely for your information, of course. It's not what you think." Another mumbled spell, and the screen comes to life, blank for now. "As I said, Professor Snape is not what he seems. Rather, he is considerably more."

Harry can't take his eyes off the blue screen. Then he jumps almost a foot off the chair when music begins to come from nowhere and Headmaster Dumbledore begins to *sing*.

/He's a cold-hearted Snape
Look into his eyes
Oh oh oh
He's been tellin' lies/

The screen resolves into a scene that makes Harry gasp. It's Severus Snape, and he's... kissing... Professor Lupin? No, no doubt, that's Lupin and Snape has him up against the wall, literally, hand shoved up underneath the werewolf's robes and hips grinding against the other man's.

No. It must be a mistake.

/He's a lover boy at play
He don't play by rules
Oh oh oh
Boy don't play the fool-no/

But there is no mistake. The scene changes, and it's clearly Halloween, Harry can see the decorations, and he can also see Lupin's mouth fixed firmly on Snape's impressive arousal. The werewolf is on his knees in front of the Potions master, who is sitting in one of the big chairs in the otherwise deserted staff room. Harry watches, in horror and tentative arousal, as Snape's head falls back against the chair and his eyes roll back; Lupin is apparently very good at what he does.

Maybe it was last Halloween, before they were together?

/You're the one givin' up the love
Anytime he needs it
But you turn your back and then he's off
and runnin' with the crowd/

Harry shifts in his chair, desire now warring with embarrassment as he realizes he's the star of the show now. That is most definitely the Boy Who Lived spread-eagled on the bed, as Snape climbs up on top of him, drawing a feather down his naked chest. Harry's erection pulses as he remembers that night well.

/You're the one to sacrifice
Anything to please him
Do you really think he thinks about you
when he's out/

The scene changes as he watches himself leave... he remembers fondly that he could hardly walk that night. But his heart lurches as he sees a man step from the fireplace, just after he himself leaves, and the man is none other than Sirius Black! His own godfather! The two men set upon each other, devouring each other with mouths and hands, ripping each other's clothes off. Soon the two men are wrestling on the bed, naked, their hard muscular bodies entwined, and Harry is disturbed to find he is more turned on than ever. The shock is starting to wear off now... He watches, eager to know who ends up on top, but Dumbledore is still singing and the scene changes again...

/He's a cold-hearted Snape
Look into his eyes
Oh oh oh
He's been tellin' lies
He's a lover boy at play
He don't play by rules
Oh oh oh
Boy don't play the fool--no

It was only late last night
He was out there sneakin'
Then he called you up to check that you
were waiting by the phone/

Yes, he remembers this too, he was bidding Snape goodbye in the Potions classroom, just before the professor was off to a conference. Soon Harry is bent over the table, pants around his ankles as Snape pounds into him; the table shakes with their ferocity. He still has the bite marks on his shoulder...

He sees himself leaving, then the scene switches to Snape's rooms, obviously later that day, and who steps into the room but Lucius Malfoy. This time, it is Snape's turn to be tied down, face down and ass raised for the elder Malfoy to peruse and plunder. Perversely, Harry is even more turned on by this. By now he knows something is seriously wrong with him. But who else could there be? No... not...

/All the world's a candy store
He's been trick or treatin'
When it comes to true love boy with him
there's no one home/

Double Potions class ends, and Harry sees himself leave with a backwards glance at his lover. But one student remains... Draco Malfoy himself. The blond boy approaches the professor's desk with a smirk on his coldly beautiful face... Harry watches breathlessly as Draco seduces Snape. Soon the blond is sitting on the professor's lap, wiggling seductively, and Snape's hand is sliding under those Slytherin robes...

Again, Harry is denied the pleasure of seeing the completion of the encounter and he growls softly in frustration. He slides his own hand discreetly under his robes, hoping Dumbledore won't notice, but the old wizard is caught up in his tale, still singing...

/He's a cold-hearted Snape
Look into his eyes
Oh oh oh
He's been tellin' lies
He's a lover boy at play
He don't play by rules
Oh oh oh
Boy don't play the fool--no

You could find somebody better boy
He could only make you cry
You deserve somebody better boy
He's c-cold as ice/

The door flies open, crashing against the far wall. Harry spins in his chair to see Snape himself, in full glower and indignation, standing there. He quickly takes in the scene: Dumbledore singing and dancing, Harry playing with himself, and his sexual exploits all captured on VHS...

"ALBUS!"

"Severus!"

"Professor!"

"Harry!"

Snape growls, slams the door shut and sweeps over to the monitor. He turns it off, and in the ensuing silence speaks low and dangerously.

"Albus. What. Is. The. Meaning. Of. This?"

The headmaster has the grace to look abashed. "Severus, I only thought to let the boy know what he is getting into..."

Both older men turn to look at the young wizard, who is still rubbing his erection through his trousers. He looks up at them.

"Harry," begins Dumbledore patiently. "I'm sorry I had to show you that."

"No, he's not," snorts Snape. "I'm sorry you had to see all this, Harry." Snape's voice softens as he goes to kneel by Harry's chair. "I... didn't mean to keep anything from you, really. I just... have all these urges... and I wasn't sure if you'd understand." Snape looks down, ashamed of himself. "I understand if you don't want to see me any more, Harry. But ~"

Harry has to interrupt finally. "I liked it," he breathes in the professor's ear.

Snape's head snaps up. "What?" Coal black eyes blaze into green ones.

"I said," Harry repeats huskily, taking Snape's hand and placing it on his erection, "I liked seeing you that way. With them. All of them." He moans softly as the older man rubs his length. "You're a slut, Professor Snape. I want to watch..."

Dumbledore watches them in shock. "But..."

Snape stands up smoothly, drawing Harry with him, turns to face the headmaster. "As you can see, Albus, your interference was actually quite helpful. I foresee an interesting upturn in our recreational activities, so to speak. So if you will refrain from interfering," he pauses significantly, "and recording, we can get back to normal."

Dumbledore looks at Harry searchingly. "Are you sure, Harry? You're all right with this?"

"Actually, I do have one question, Professor Dumbledore sir," Harry says, grinning. "Can I have those tapes?"